Dreamspeak

I slept for ten hours last night. Mackenzie's almost at twelve. We were exhausted. I had forgotten how enveloping swim and dive season is each July. This month, the pool comes first and everything else is an after-thought. If we're not too tired to remember everything else...

I had the strangest dream last night. I was going to teach a yoga class at the base gym and I was so excited and I had my sign-up sheet and music and had a plan... Until I arrived on the day of the class. Then I couldn't find the class list, I lost my music under a pile of my own junk, about 75 people showed up instead of the 8-12 women I was expecting, and it was only then that I remembered that I wasn't certified to teach yoga and, in fact, it had been about 3 years since I took a class myself. I woke up in a panic, just as everyone was starting to realize I had no Idea what I was doing. It was hideous, and now I've started the day feeling anxious and inadequate.

I always want to assign meaning to my dreams. I had one a few weeks ago, where a good male friend and I were at a party in Indiana with my family and having a great time. T was nowhere to be found. It bothered me for days, what that dream could mean.

It's not very often that I have a frivolous, just-for-fun dream. Lately, they've all been very deep and unsettling and maybe even a little too close to truth for me. My unconscious is trying to tell me something, but I'm not listening. I presume the dreams will just get worse and worse until I listen.

I wonder how long that will take.