Monday, December 18, 2006

I'm OK!

When my niece, Isabella, was a toddler and used to fall down all the time, she would jump right up, and yell as loud as she could, "I'm OK!"

And it cracked us up. Every single time.

I've been sick as a dog* since last Wednesday, but I'll be back tomorrow. I felt better today but had to spend it catching up with all the errands and jobs that I've been putting off all week long while lying on the sofa. So now I'm exhausted.

*Which I don't understand, because I have a dog and he never ever has a sore throat and stuffed-up sinuses.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

On Breaking the Rules

When she got in the car, she looked at me with despair and said, "I got a 'Think Sheet' today." I didn't know what a "Think Sheet" was, but the horror in her eyes led me to believe that it wasn't a Good Thing.

"What happened?"

"I was Bad."

And so the story goes: She didn't feel good at lunch so she didn't want anything to eat. But she did have some gum in her pocket, so she chewed on that but spit it out before returning to class. Where the real trouble began was that she shared it with her friends, Trouble & Sporty, neither of whom spit hers out before returning to class and then got busted faster than you can say, "Bad idea." While up collecting their "Think Sheets" from Ms. K, one of them told on Mac who then was awarded her very own "Think Sheet" to facilitate the pondering of the error of her ways. She was upset that she got in trouble, but more upset that one of her friends snitched on her before she had the chance to fess up herself.

So, in my true Alternative Parenting Style, I took a deep breath, pursed my lips, looked at her, and said, "Well, if the rule is that there is no gum in school, then you shouldn't take gum to school. But as far as this little infraction goes... I don't really care."

And she got a little teary and looked at me with relief in her eyes, and I continued, "It's not like you were stealing. Or vandalizing the school. Or cheating. None of those things are ok. But chewing gum? It's not a big deal."

"But what if the teacher wants to talk with you about it?"

"Well, I doubt she will, but if she does, I'll tell her that I understand you broke a rule, but I just really don't care."

And she started to laugh. And she was ok until about 30 minutes later:

"Mom, remember that time in 4th grade when we got in trouble for talking during class?"

"Yes."

"Well, they said then, that if we ever got in trouble again, it would go on our Permanent Record."

And my mouth dropped open, and I paused a moment to let the enormity of the situation sink in before I asked, "Mackenzie. Do you know what that means?"

And her eyes got wide with fear, "No. What?"

"Absolutely nothing. Your teacher totally made that up." And we both started cracking up. And she felt better. She filled out her "Think Sheet," turned it in the next day, and life as we know it has continued on, even though Mac had gum at lunch.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Christmas Flamingos

Really, bottom line, I haven't had much to say. I've had a lot on my mind, making the Blogging thing seem a little banal (which, let's face it, it is). But I have saved up a few tidbits to share with everyone in Internetland:

A) I have a weird v-configuration between my bottom teeth which allows for the teeniest, tiniest tastebud on the tip of my tongue to get caught between them. Then I pull. It hurts like a MoFo. Then it's all swollen, making it that much more likely to happen again. And again. And again. It's starting to make me cranky.

2) This is the paper tag that came off Mac's skein of green eyelash yarn:



I do not understand how ANYONE at that company could fail to realize that their yarn-holder-togetherer looks like an erect penis.

C) I finally broke down and gave Dog a bath on Saturday. He was about 3 weeks past odiferous.

Dog before bath:


"You can't see me..."


Dog after bath:




D) Our Christmas tree is up in the living room, but this is what makes me terrifically happy:



And lastly) This one counts as a twofer. It's my "Self-Portrait Saturday," combined with a photo of the super-soft scarf that I knitted myself: