The Good, the Bad, and the Alex

Last night was not a good night. Alex started to melt down around 2 in the afternoon and nothing we did could change the terrible path of destruction he was on. Sometimes, there's a trigger for his meltdowns and we watch and we learn to adapt and eliminate the triggers from his environment. But sometimes, like yesterday, the meltdown is like a fantastic spring storm that you first see on the horizon. You take measures to try to prepare for it and take precautions to minimize the damage, but sometimes no matter what you do, the storm is inevitable. Sometimes it's too big to try and avert with our meager human ways and all we can do is resort to damage control.

Yesterday, the storm started at 2 and didn't end until it was knocked back with medication and wrestled to bed just before 7, leaving a swath of destruction and tears and a fair amount of pain in it's wake.

But today. Today, Alex couldn't have been more wonderful. He hugged and kissed me when I got home from work, he stopped playing his airplane game without complaint to get in the car and fetch Mackenzie from practice, he sat down to eat with just one no and then moseyed off to the bath after I asked only once.

Then, he signed that he needed to sit to take his shoes off.

He signed "sit!" And I've never seen him do that before. We communicated! He told me what he needed, and I was able to help him!

It's days like today that make the very gray and stormy days fade into the background of our consciousness and allow the Baby Steps that we yearn to see float to the surface and restore our Hope.

Mackenzie Turns 15

For 15 years, I've been continuously amazed by this wonderful creature. As a baby, she was so stubborn, she wouldn't let anyone other than me push the grocery cart or her stroller. She walked before 9 months, surprising everyone with her tiny upright body. Her fluffy, cornsilk hair turned into crazy red-brown corkscrews right before my eyes. Then one day, she she started talking, and hasn't stopped since.

Mackenzie is wise beyond her years and her maturity, at times, puts me to shame. She adapted to a new stepfather and 2 new brothers with amazing grace, and took the initiative to learn American Sign Language to better communicate with Alex. I can always count on her to step in when my patience with him runs low. Her compassion and empathy are impressive (considering how much she doesn't like babies).

After we moved back Home, Mackenzie quickly made friends and in school, she ranks 19th out of her class of over 500. When she needs homework help, she's on her own. Mackenzie's a dedicated athlete, and has to talk me into dragging my butt out of bed to take her to 5:45am practice. This spirit is probably why, as a freshman, she competes on the Varsity Swim Team.

Mackenzie makes me laugh. She is in my head and I in hers. When no one else "gets" us, we "get" each other. Sometimes we just have to look at each other to know what the other's thinking and it's all over for the people in our midst. We dissolve into giggles like two best friends at a slumber party. I can always count on her to tell me Which Shoes? or answer me truthfully when I ask, "Do these pants make my butt look big?"

Mackenzie hasn't decided what she wants to be when she grows up, but has ruled out her baby dreams of being a Mounted Police Officer. Last I heard, it was a toss-up between Sign Language Teacher in a Special Needs Classroom and News Anchor. She's got a while to decide, and I plan on just sitting back to enjoy the ride.

You all know how I believe in Serendipity. And what a happy accident that I was appointed to be her mother. I know that Mackenzie is destined to grow into a stunning and extraordinary woman, someone we can all be proud of.

Raise your glass to a memorable Past and a wondrous Future.

Happy Birthday, Baby Girl!

Listening to Mac

A year ago, I bought Mackenzie the Twilight series for her for Christmas. She promptly read them all in less than a week and then accosted me with the entire series, saying I MUST read them Right Now. But I was busy. I was painting the house and starting a new job and still adjusting to the addition of 3 more boys into our Girl House. And I didn't read them.

Then out of the blue, just after Christmas this year, I picked them up and read them all in under 2 weeks. The only reason I didn't read them more quickly was that pesky job of mine and my terribly annoying habit of falling asleep the moment I get horizontal.

I LOVEDLOVEDLOVED the entire series and each time I had to put one of them down, I couldn't wait to pick it back up again and learn what was happening with Bella next. They were an easy read and sometimes silly, but the story did it's job and took me away from Child Protection and dishes and 100-pound-meltdowns, to a Make Believe world for a short time each evening.

The moral of this story? We should all listen to Mackenzie. She knows of what she speaks.

Reading List 2010

Someday, I'll start reading again. For now, I keep plugging along...

• The Alchemist's Daughter ~ Katharine McMahon
  

7 Days:Day 7: Paige is the Queen of Wii Bowling

7 Days:Day 7: Paige is the Queen of Wii Bowling
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

(But not the Queen of Wii Basketball.) Tim got Wii Resort Games for Christmas (mostly because they have the basketball and he loves the basketball.)

Unlike real bowling, where the longer I play, the more tired my arm gets and I start to suck more, Wii Bowling is easier! Lighter! Less frustrating!!

7 Days:Day6: Christmas Eve

7 Days:Day6: Christmas Eve
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

This is Alex, Tim, Paige, Joe, Dillon, and Mackenzie. These kids are what makes us laugh, and makes us worry; they're what makes us proud and what makes us love. These kids are the reason for everything we do and we couldn't be happier to be their parents.

7 Days:Day 5: Silver (Spiced Rum!)

7 Days:Day 5: Silver (Spiced Rum!)
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

Tim and I tried this Captain Morgan's Silver Spiced Rum last week at his work Christmas party. It was delicious and I've had a fair amount of it for dinner tonight.

And! A side note... Note the antlers I am wearing. Today was a weird day at work. Monday and Tuesday, no one wanted to report any child abuse or neglect. But today! Today, people who saw someone hurt a child 2 weeks ago (or longer!) decided to make a report. We did not understand this as it is Christmas Eve Eve and we planned on not working too much today. ANYWAY... So I wore these antlers in an attempt to keep our mood light and happy. THEN! I wore them home. I have 4 teenagers in my home. Alex (15, Nonverbal Autism) saw me and was so excited to see that Ma turned into Rudolph during the day and kept signing, "Rudolph"! Then, separately, I conversed with Joe (18), Dillon (21), and Mackenzie (15). Not a one of them mentioned that I was wearing antlers on my head. It was very surreal.

When asked, Mackenzie stated that it just didn't seem out of the ordinary to her.

7 Days:Day4: Paige in a Box

7 Days:Day4: Paige in a Box
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

So. Today you get a photo of me at work. Though any "work" you see here is simulated as it is 2 days before Christmas, we are working with a skeleton crew, and wholly unmotivated.

7 Days:Day 3: Reading

7 Days:Day 3: Reading?
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

Mackenzie and I trying to read after a hard day. She had a swim meet in Indianapolis, I worked. Then we baked cookies!

7 Days:Day 2: Toasty Treat

7 Days:Day 2: Toasty Treat
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

This is Fire in our new fireplace! For the past 2 years I've lived in this house, there was an antique (read "unuseable") gas heater and an awful draft to this fireplace. This year, thanks to my husband, I am warm and toasty.

(He, of course, has to sit around in his underwear because the living room is an inferno.)

7 Days:Day 1: After

7 Days:Day 1: After
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

7 Days is back. I neglected to post the Fall 09 run and it seems that "Cartwheels" could use a jumpstart so here we go!

After the Firefighter Christmas Party. I suspect that Tim might have a headache tomorrow. Thank you, Russ, for the reminder! I saw it at 11:52pm. Just in the nick of time!

We're Booking Now!

Eight months ago I started to read a book. Tonight I finished it. I think it was good but I really only remember the last hundred or so pages. And then I cried at the end. It's name is "Firefly Lane."

Now I am faced with the awesome task of choosing my next book. There are several that have languished in my bookcase for quite some time (or years - I'm looking at you, "Poisonwood Bible"), the last book in the Kay Scarpetta series... I thought about "Vanishing Acts" but I fear that I have already read it and I just don't remember. I have a book in there called "Hypocrite in a Pouffy White Dress." I think I'll try that one next as anything too deep these days causes me to lose interest with alarming speed. I've wanted to read "Wicked" but I am afraid that all those made-up names will distract me from the story. Mac wants me to read those vampire books. (What are they called?) I could totally do that but it seems like a huge commitment - have you seen how big they are? They could be the last books I ever enjoy at my current rate of reading.

I have read "Fireman Small" countless times over the past two years but that can only take me so far in the Literary Satisfaction Department. Therefore, I'm currently open for suggestions. If you have a book that you lovedlovedloved, please let me know. Just don't let it be too cumbersome. I can only dedicate a limited number of brain cells to reading lately. Thank you for your participation.

7 Days:Day 7: Happily Ever After

7 Days:Day 7: Happily Ever After
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

I love this. It was a gift from Tim's mom.

7 Days:Day 6: Mantle

7 Days:Day 6: Mantle
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

These are the objects that sit on my mantle.

7 Days:Day 5: Bedtime Ritual

7 Days:Day 5: Bedtime Ritual
Originally uploaded by Cartwheels At Midnight

Every night, Tim and I get into bed, turn on the TV, the timer set for 120 minutes, and then promptly fall asleep. We never watch an entire show.