I hung up on someone else today.
And before I go any further, I just have to say:
If I get fired for blogging about my job it will absolutely be worth it just so the rest of the world understands the extent of Crazy I deal with here.
My phone rang at 9:02 this morning. It was Old Mrs. Randolph.
This was not the first time I talked with Mrs. Randolph. About 2 weeks ago I had a lovely/deranged conversation with her. She called to complain that the landscapers had blown a "big pile" of pinecones out of the gutter and onto
But this morning, it wasn't about the pinecones. Apparently children have been playing near her townhouse. She had already called the police but they didn't do anything so she was calling me. On weekends and evenings children are climbing trees and playing behind the brick wall (surrounding her back patio) and being noisy and she can't go out in her yard.
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Randolph, but our By-Laws don't state that parents must keep their children inside."
"I don't want them to stay inside, I just want them to stay away from my house."
"Well, I'm sorry Mrs. Randolph, but as the By-Laws don't restrict where the children play, there is nothing I can really do about it."
"WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED. YOU NEVER DO ANYTHING. I CALLED 3 WEEKS AGO ABOUT THE PINECONES IN MY YARD AND THEY ARE STILL THERE!"
"Mrs. Randolph, I'm sorry about that. I'm sure what happened is that the landscaper just couldn't find the pinecones..."
"THEY WERE RIGHT THERE UNDER THE PINE TREE!"
"May I please finish my sentence? I'm sure he didn't see what pinecones you were talking about. I even checked after him and when I drove by I didn't see a pile of pinecones. There were only about 4 pinecones..."
"YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF YOUR CAR!"
"Mrs. Randolph, please don't yell at me first thing in the morning."
"I AM NOT YELLING..."
click.
And then she called back later and when I didn't answer the phone because someone was in my office she left a message:
"I know you're in there and don't you ever hang up on me again or I'll be right there in your office."
Oooooh. A Challenge.
7 comments:
You are such a brave woman to put up with that crap everyday. I mean, any thing to do with customer service is generally crazy. but THAT? I'd come home everyday in need a a big drink and big hug.
Crazy woman...
I'd love to comment, but I am still just dazed by the craziness. You know, I used to think that "Jaywalk all-stars" was staged because there were NO people THAT stupid. Until your blog, I would have never believed that ANYONE was THIS crazy/bitchy. Come to find out there are many someones, livng in one place no less. My naivete is slowly eroding.
You obviously have the patience of Mother Theresa and the Virgin Mary all rolled into one.
OH please Mrs. Randolph. Please stop by.
God, make her stop by.
Not to be vulgar but you need to b*tchslap that woman. Okay, okay. That was vulgar and I apologize. But seriously...
I'm with everyone else - and pleaseeee videotape! Good LORD! Seriously, she can come threaten you, but she can't get the kids out of her yard? Whatever.
I got up and went for a walk before work this morning, and when I got back I checked to see what was happening... and I busted out laughing! I laugh out of symphathy. You tell it so well, I thought I was a fly on the wall.
I thought of a few ways that Crazy could remedy the kid issue, but it would be illegal and she might actually do it! So, I refrain from listing ideas. :-)
Good Luck with this. Keep us posted.
If she comes in, I say you give her The Peoples Elbow.
Honestly, the horror of it all - children playing outdoors, pinecones under the tree! How do you expect her to live in this kind of Soddom and Gohmorra? What's next? Leaves in her yard this fall? Garbage trucks rolling down her street? Really.
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