So. I've been thinking:
Back in the day when I was married (remember that?), I used to drink alone all the time. I mean, when your husband is deployed for 6 months (or more) at a time, drinking alone becomes a necessity; you can't plan a dinner party every time you want to have a glass of wine, simply to stave-off any presumptions of "issues". And I think this is pretty normal for Navy wives. I can't speak for other branches, but I know my girlfriends indulge in the same healthy manner as myself. (I don't know about civilian wives either. I suppose I will learn.) Though he was gone, the fact that he was coming home made it seem ok. It made it seem as though I wasn't actually drinking Alone. I was just drinking in a different Time Zone.
But now, when I have a drink in the evening (not every evening), I feel a tad guilty about it. As if I'm doing something wrong. Something potentially harmful and somewhat improper. Pouring myself a glass of wine in the evening has an air of pathetic-ness to it that didn't exist before. Before, having a glass of wine while making dinner for my family seemed regular. It was just what I did. Now, having a glass of wine with the grilled cheese sandwich or the salad we threw together feels a little wicked. It makes me feel as though I have to keep peeking over my shoulder to ensure that no one gets the wrong impression of me now.
And I don't like it because I'm the same Me as I was Before.
Do you guys drink alone? What do you think about it?
Midnight Edit - So I was just thinking about it, and I think what makes me feel like it's not ok now, is that in the event of an emergency, I'm the only parent the kids have to come to their aid and even one glass puts me close to the limit - I'm still a "One and you're done" kind of thinker. Even when T was still living here, if I was the only parent home while Dillon was out, I didn't drink at all lest I get the Dreaded Phonecall. Now I'm always the only parent available. On the other hand, I am certain that while completely abstaining from the drink "in case of emergency," will make me prepared for any crisis at every possible second, it will also make me cranky.
(I actually wrote about this here last year.)
9 comments:
Yes. Not every night.
On my second margaritta. Actually only 1 1/2... just added to the first to finish off the mixer.
Hey... it is FRIDAY! But I didn't have any limes... drats.
I think you are indeed the same independent, adult "you" and that means you get to enjoy and indulge in adult beverages. I don't see it as "wicked" at all. I actually told someone once that I was "classing up" my so called dinner when having a glass of pinot gris with grilled cheese. I can't imagine ANYONE judging you for a drink or two.
Beleive me, I see pathetic and desperate every day. It comes in the form of chardonnay over ice in a big gulp cup at 9am.
And, I am currently alone on a Friday night (per usual) and I just finished a lovely Italian orange soda with vanilla skyy.
Keep making good family meals that you all can help with. Then you won't be alone. . . you'll just be the only one legal. Or I'll come down there three times a week and get drunk with you.
: )
I don't think having a drink by yourself is a big deal. I think there is a big different from having a drink and getting drunk by yourself.
Back when I was in school [it's going to be a LONG time before I get used to saying that] I would have wine while writing a post, paper or homework assignment. It was just something I enjoyed to do every once and awhile.
Although I'm not going to lie. When going out, I would tend to maybe have more than a few glasses of wine. This way I was properly buzzed and didn't have to pay for the drinks at the bar.
The whole thing rings true, but the edit, that's what it is. It's having to be the only Responsible Adult to Care for these Younger People. That being said, I just indulged in a glass of wine. Emergencies be darned.
Emergencies be darned indeed - after all Mac and Cheese (what?) are old enough now that they're less likely to be falling down the stairs or drinking the bleach when you're not looking. Ok, there was that time recently that poor Dillon flambéed to his head, but you can't abstain from a glass of wine for the rest of your life on the offchance that he does it again. I agree with John - there's a difference between having a drink on your own and getting drunk on your own. You should only get drunk with me.
Please don't tell me there is something wrong with drinking alone. PLEASE! You'll shatter my world. :)
How about this, if you ever feel it is not appropriate, you call one of us, and we'll pour a glass as well. Then you're not drinking alone! You know some of us only need a slight excuse to drink!
Or we could set up designated drinking times for the Blog Spawn. It could be expected that a majority of blog spawn members will be having a cocktail, say, nightly between 4pm and 9pm (face it, most of us are in bed by 9), relevant to their own local time.
Let me snap you back to inappropriate and improper. WC. Are you with me? You, my friend, are PERFECTLY normal!
Thanks guys, you always make me feel better. (Well, you and the Caipirhinas...)
MB~ Yum! I'm guessing that tastes like a Creamsicle?
Bridge~ That's a lot of training down here just to make me feel better. But, OK!
John~ Hey! I forgot about the pre-bar buzz... I think I'm going to have to start doing that again.
HK~ Amen!
Sarah~ You crack me up, girl.
Candi~ WC - heh. - you always know how to make me feel better.
CHEERS!
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