Wednesday, February 14, 2007

On Overcoming Distraction

Have you noticed lately, how all my posts have been very ADD-laden, listy sort of affairs? It's because my mind's been brimming with plans and fears and insecurities; 'what ifs' and 'if onlys' for far too long - nearly a year. I'm having a hard time choosing a subject, let alone concentrating on it for long enough to write a post that anyone should care to read. I sit down to write and all that comes to mind is moving and job-searching and Mediated Agreements; where to start picking up the pieces of my life - which ones do I keep and try to fashion into a new life? ...which ones do I discard for better or for worse? ...wondering how they will all piece back together to create a new definition of 'Paige'. It's exhausting to be this consistently self-involved, and so incredibly dull to have nothing else on my mind.

So. I've decided that baby steps are my friend, and I've started doing a few things to re-train my mind to look past my personal trainwreck and focus on one thing, any thing for a while:
I finally read a book.

I bought a book of 100 New York Times crossword puzzles (because I don't get the paper every day, and even if I did, the Post does not carry the NYT crosswords and those are my favorites).

I've started to make a To-Do list of everything I need to accomplish during the next several months (that right there feels like an elephant on my chest) before the divorce is final and we migrate to Indiana.

I'm writing this post. (Does concentrating on writing a post about not being able to concentrate cancel itself out and put me right back at the beginning?).
(OH MY GOD! I just wrote a list! I may have a problem that will require Intervention.)

8 comments:

Annie, The Evil Queen said...

Hey, did you get your Christmas Yeah...But pad from me? Might be good for whittling down that pesky "keep it or move on" list. I love lists, so call me if you need a lifeguard whilst wading through.

Anonymous said...

I love lists. All that says to me is that you're trying to order your life. I see nothing odd about that.

sarah doow said...

Lists are good, I love 'em.

Anonymous said...

Meh. I don't care if you're posting The Divine Intervention of Your Shits (literally) as long as you're posting.

Brenda said...

Okay. I'm in Mazatlan. Laptop hanging off the ledge of the 9th floor just so I can snag free wi-fi. And the stuff at the top of the blogger comment thingy is in SPANISH!

Anyway..... lists... ya. They can be a good thing. I usually can't find mine.

Baby steps are the best.

Candi said...

Hi Girlie - I like scratching things off my lists rather than making them. So I put stupid things on my lists that I *KNOW* I will be getting done - like get gas in the car. Well, duh. But, it's scratch off my list! And the longer my lists, the more busy I feel :)

Candi said...

And another thing - I'm commenting here because I don't know if you'll go back over to mine - you do NOT get to apologize for this so called self involvement. HELLO. Seriously? You apologized? Come one. I wish I could be there (literally right next to you) for you.

PS - I got my first "Did you hear about Paige and Tater" the other day. It was followed shortly by, "Oh, wait, of course you did."

el-e-e said...

your logic is SO like mine. The 'cancelling out' comment had me cracking up (but hoping it's not true).

I say, it's a place to begin. :)