I'm A Big Fat Liar

I started working Today.

Observing a co-worker during home visits.

And tomorrow too.

Now I have to go to bed because the 6 am alarm is killing me.

Bringing Sexy Back

I couldn't find any Hydrocortisone. But I was desperate, so I went back to that bottle I'd been ignoring. It brought back so many memories of my childhood - hikes and camping trips that frequently ended up in Poison Ivy. Is there anything more distinctive than the color and smell of Calamine lotion?

I didn't want to have to go there, but my ears are burning (and not in an oh, someone's talking about me sort of way) and red and swollen; they are scaly and bumpy and itchy (sexy, I know), as is the surrounding 2 inches of skin and the back of my neck. It's bad. It started yesterday morning and has gotten worse and worse over the past 2 days until tonight, when I was ready to rip my ears off, just to rid myself of the discomfort.

I wracked my brain, trying to figure it out. All I could think was that I had my hair returned to it's natural state (minus 4 inches (!!)) on Monday. Maybe my ears were a reaction to the chemicals? But my scalp was fine... not to mention the fact that Omm used the same haircolor she's been using for the past 13 years...

Then all of a sudden it hit me - sometimes, when I wear my glasses, the skin behind my ears is raw and itchy the next day (which for most people, would make them think they were allergic and they would stop wearing the glasses - me, not so much as I am Stubborn). I wore my glasses Monday night whilst studying for my Tuesday morning interview. Duh.

Unfortunately, this "A-Ha Moment" didn't solve the problem - I was still uncomfortable and distracted and whining like a big fat baby to anyone who would listen.

So back to the Tub-O-Pharmaceuticals I went, zeroing in on the Calamine Lotion. But when I picked it up, I noticed how it had the distinctive air of "Flea Market". The bottle actually stated, "Shatterproof Bottle" in big letters, right on the front. Remember when plastic bottles were considered an evolutionary advance for humans? I turned the bottle over, not expecting to find an expiration date. "1/88." January 1988. (Which probably means it was purchased about 3 years earlier.) Seriously. Think about it... what were you doing in 1988? That was a DAMN long time ago.

Regardless of this scary fact, I was desperate (remember the desperation?) ...so I shook the antique Calamine Lotion up. I smelled it. And as it smelled exactly like it was supposed to, I grabbed a cotton ball and now I'm sporting chalky pink ears and neck, the scent unmistakably Eau de Summer, 1985.

The News, It Is Good

I got the job.......

(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

I start training on Monday.

In the nutshell, I'm an Intervention Specialist, working with families in need of services (parental education, coping skills, general life skills...) referred to my company, from the Department of Child Services.

Thanks for the well-wishes, crossed fingers, and prayers!

Girl, Out of Her Box

This was written last week, when I arrived early for an interview at Purdue and waited in the hallway, in a chair, outside the doorway of an English classroom...

It's been 16 years since I sat in these hallways. Back then, in my early 20's, I had on some old, ripped-up Levi's, sneakers, and a sweatshirt (probably inside out).

Today, at 40, I have somehow traveled full circle and am back where I started.

I sit here in my favorite designer suit with the kicky pleated skirt, wearing black slingback pumps of the same designer, my hands shaking slightly, my too-long hair pulled back in a sensible black barrette.

I am early. By 30 minutes. So I decide that a scan of the job description I am interviewing for and a quick study of my resume might be prudent at this point, but I am distracted. Young students, Dillon's age; grad students, barely older; and professors pass me in the hall, giving me a sideways glance, no-doubt wondering why I am looking so spiffy and uncomfortable in their hallway on a rainy Thursday afternoon.

The job I am here to interview for is something I don't really want to Do. It's a secretarial position. Of all the things I never wanted to be, "Secretary" was near the top of the list - I worked hard in college, my motivation avoiding having to be a secretary some day. (Ironic, isn't it?) But as life goes on, priorities change and at this point, being free of a dysfunctional relationship far outweighs taking a job that falls short of my career goals and in the end, after talking myself in yet another circle, I really do want this job.

So I take a deep breath, put on a smile, and return to studying my resume.

But I keep eyeing my watch, my stomach feeling tighter with each passing minute.

Finally, it's time...