On Overcoming Distraction

Have you noticed lately, how all my posts have been very ADD-laden, listy sort of affairs? It's because my mind's been brimming with plans and fears and insecurities; 'what ifs' and 'if onlys' for far too long - nearly a year. I'm having a hard time choosing a subject, let alone concentrating on it for long enough to write a post that anyone should care to read. I sit down to write and all that comes to mind is moving and job-searching and Mediated Agreements; where to start picking up the pieces of my life - which ones do I keep and try to fashion into a new life? ...which ones do I discard for better or for worse? ...wondering how they will all piece back together to create a new definition of 'Paige'. It's exhausting to be this consistently self-involved, and so incredibly dull to have nothing else on my mind.

So. I've decided that baby steps are my friend, and I've started doing a few things to re-train my mind to look past my personal trainwreck and focus on one thing, any thing for a while:

I finally read a book.

I bought a book of 100 New York Times crossword puzzles (because I don't get the paper every day, and even if I did, the Post does not carry the NYT crosswords and those are my favorites).

I've started to make a To-Do list of everything I need to accomplish during the next several months (that right there feels like an elephant on my chest) before the divorce is final and we migrate to Indiana.

I'm writing this post. (Does concentrating on writing a post about not being able to concentrate cancel itself out and put me right back at the beginning?).

(OH MY GOD! I just wrote a list! I may have a problem that will require Intervention.)