*Really. You should listen to Dane Cook. He's cracks me up. (Of course, I'm easily amused. So. If you happen to listen to him and you don't like him, I don't want to hear about it. Also. Don't listen to him if you don't like dirty jokes. Or if you have no sense of humour**.)
**The extra "u" is for Val, Sarah, Andromeda, and MIL. Just trying to make you feel at home.
2) When you are facing away from the counter at the new used-bookstore Mac and I stumbled upon Saturday, it is likely that you will get hit in the back of the head. And when you turn around, it will be a black cat named Ranger leaning in for the requisite scratch.
3) When you spend the afternoon cooking and you want to pull your curly hair up off your neck but you're too
4) "One size fits all" Capezio children's tights do not, in fact, fit "all", even though the girl at the dance supplies store assured me they would. Even after I pointed out that the photo on the packaging was of a four-year-old girl. and I had, standing right next to me, an eleven-year-old girl who was very clearly much bigger than the advertized four-year-old girl. In fact, they barely fit one of Mac's very slender, regular-sized-legs. We will be going back for the adult tights tomorrow.
5) Taiko has some sort of creeping crud. (Dianne & Ang, remember that mystery skin ailment he had about 5 years ago right after a trip home? It's back, interestingly, right after a trip home. Coincidence?) It was never properly diagnosed, but I was also dealing with a Japanese Vet. I'm entirely confident of his Veterinary abilities in Japanese, but am somewhat skeptical of his ESL Vet abilities. Not to mention, what if Tike's rash was singularly an American ailment?
(Hi, my name is Paige and I'm Easily Distracted.)
6) Left to her own devices, Mac will put off weekend homework until 8:30pm Sunday night. Which leads me off on another tangent: WHY, please tell me, my teacher-readers, do teachers assign, for 6th graders, "decorating-your-homemade-book-cover" as homework? She had to decorate both her Math Notebook and the cover she made for her Social Studies Notebook. I'm sorry, but as a busy mom, this is a SUPREME waste of time to me! If it's about identifying her books, I've got a Sharpie and about 37 extra seconds in which to write M-a-c-k-e-n-z-i-e on them. Then she will easily recognize her notebooks and be free to clean her room, help me cook dinner or, more importantly, write that Essay titled "About Me" that her homeroom teacher assigned.
22 comments:
1. BAMF - another fun culture lesson for the week!
3. Remind me to never eat corn at your house...
4. Have they met Bella??
6. Dude. Stickers. That's all I have for that.
About 6 months ago I was thrust (forced, persuaded, compelled, driven, urged, imposed-on - well, you get the picture) to take over raising my 9 year old nephew and 11 year old niece. Both of whom I adore endlessly. Really. My "kids," both males, are 27 and the oldest turns 31 today. 6th grade is KILLING ME. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!!! Math sucks. Homework really sucks. I know no other mothers because at 53 my peers are doing something else but not doing math homework! God help me. God help us all! (Great blog btw and hopefully I can learn a lot here about raising a 6th grade girl) Speaking of which - what do I do about the period 'thing?' She looks mortified everytime I even look like I'm thinking of mentioning it!! HELP ME!
AND, OMG...I JUST went to Nordstorms and JUST SPENT $700.00 on Trish McEvoy makeup! No kidding. I got the BIG 'binder', black and quilted. And brushes and stuff. Stuff, stuff, stuff. You're the only person I've ever admitted this to! Well, except my husband who knows to never get between me and a make up counter at Nordstroms. I love Trish McEvoy. I should have taken a picture - I also saved all the boxes...no kidding...
Okay, Paige. From a teacher/parent/neurotic woman:
The decorating thing is one of those projects that teachers who have no lives assign. For instance, ask yourself if this teacher a)has kids of her own, b)has grown kids who are no longer living at home, therefore are no longer a responsibility, c)is near the end of his/her retirement, or d)just loves to piss parents off.
Any one of those answers being yes, you'll find a teacher who really needs to get a life and quit assigning meaningless "chores" to students who end up having their parents help them just so they can get it finished before the end of their lives. Know what I'm sayin'?
I, being a teacher who has her own children to deal with, don't assign stupid shit. Period.
I know what it is like to do a "Pioneer Project" in the fourth grade. Yes, me, not the kids. It is one of those cutesie things that every fourth grader since the beginning of time has to do in these parts of the country. Stupid. Meaningless. Expensive.
I refuse to give assignments that make no sense and require hours of time. It just doesn't work. What you need to do is write a "well-written" letter to this teacher, asking her what state standard this project covered. Tell her you'd like to see it in writing. That'll freak her out and make her think you are so on top of your parental shit. Oh, please, Paige - DO IT!!!
I have to totally agree with Nina. Waste of good time. I would of left the notebook blank and when the teacher asked, I would of said..."It's a work in Progress, by the end of the year it should be done."
And the Pioneer Project!?!?! We don't have those out here. We had something similar, but I don't recall the name of the project, but I do remember that my hub (now x) had an excuse to buy a scroll saw, so he could make a covered wagon. I don't recall him letting Chris try out the scroll saw....I made a small quilt but I let Chris help with the other items for the covered wagon. Then when we went to the school to see the other kids wagons, they were made out of cardboard boxes. Somehow, the x blew the project out of the water. But, he never helped with the Pinewood Derby. We do have Heritage Project and fortunately enough for me, we could use the same stuff from one kid to the other, just rearranged it.
Leo tattoo living up to its Leoiness...has to cause some problems (from a Leo herself)
Not in the dance phase or school phase with girls yet but - since when is it homework to do that??? Cover decorating was a (for me at least-then again I'm went-to-school-with-dinsaurs old) requisite for those boring moments in class.
Someone should tell Terri that we all can read this. . . so her $700 secret isn't really "safe." Well, I guess I just did : )
Also, my mom is 50 something with me moved out and a seventh grader still at home. It's like school somehow got drastically suckier in these ten years. No kid should have back problems from their backpack. Wait, no kid should have to use a silly rollin-through-the-airport backpack simply because they have too many books to carry. Crazy!
P.S. A special thanks to all those military families linked by Ms. Paige's blog.
P.P.S. Not blogging is just going to make me write really long comments. Shoot.
Corn pokies? We call them cornforks here. Oh well...you say potato...
1. Are you just trying it out as a possible permanent thing? Are you sure you don't want a butterfly?
2. Cats are evil, EVIL!
3. Corn pokies. Bah! But I'm with Jes, no corn at Brandi's.
4. Noodle is 8 feet tall and she thought one size was going to fit her? Stupid sales girl.
5. Eeewww, doogie crud.
6. Were there decorating parameters? Does she need to wear more than the required 15 pieces of flair?
Haha - flair...
I sooooo agree on the pointless homework issues! I used to give my kids permission NOT to do such homework, and to be honest, mostly the teachers didn't even give them a hard time when it wasn't done! As Nina said, it's only lazy, 'no-brainer' teachers who give this sort of assignment. And how would they 'mark' such a piece of homework, anyway?
I only ever taught pre-school kids, but I was a school governor for many years, and once had the job of drafting the school's Homework Policy, so I was able to put a stop to time-wasting nonsense homework like decorating books!
Terri, I really do admire you and what you're doing! (With the kids, not the make-up, that is!) Good Luck!
Perhaps kids are different in the UK, but a few months ago on a family outing my nearly-11-year-old graddaughter told the entire family group (me, her grandfather, father, 8 year-old brother, uncle, aunt and niece) "We've been learning about periods at school. I expect I'll get my first period soon, because I already noticed my hair gets very greasy, and mummy said that often happens."
We all just sort of went, "Oh." and "Er ... yes." and the conversation moved on to what else they were learning at school! Whew! That's one self-assured young lady!
Do they have 'sex education' lessons in the US, and if so, at what age? Maybe it'll be easier to talk about if / when she learns it in class, Terri?
And yes, Irish Eyes! Not having a blog myself means I do tend to comment exesively on other people's! Oooops! Sorry Paige! (blush)
*puts her feet up on the furniture* Many moons ago, when I was in school, before I was set free into the world to eat pop tarts and read blogs, we were often required to cover our newly dished-out textbooks with wrapping paper (gift wrap) in order to protect them. Wallpaper worked even better and, if you were lucky, at the beginning of the year, you'd get your hands on a textbook whose cover was still intact from the year before, thus requiring no effort on your part. And that's the level of effort I most enjoy putting into things.
Ok. Girls. I have so much to say here! Mackenzie's decorated notebooks. (Next time she has them here I'll take a photo.) I do understand the need for some teachers to feel the kids should fashion book covers for their textbook for protection's sake. A big book-condom, if you will. What I don't understand, is the requirement to decorate the Math Spiral Notebook and the Social Studies Composition book (for this one she actually had to make a grocery-bag cover for it and then decorate that). I thought Nina had a good suggestion, until Mac read it and freaked out, "No! Mom, you can't do that. Ms. Whatshername really likes you. It would hurt her feelings!" Thus, I will continue my bitching online.
Corn-pokeys - "Utensils that poke corn." Makes perfect sense to me.
Terri - Yes. Kudos to you for stepping in to raise the munchkins. It's not an easy job and we shall start a sex-talk dialogue here later this week.
HAHAHA - Flair!
Sarah~ Eat pop-tarts and read blogs! Excellent use of your education! PS - Frsoted Cherry is best.
I love Dane Cook!
And your corn-pokeys....
OMG!! You have to be joking. She really had to decorate her book covers for homework?! I've never heard of such. Granted I don't teach that grade, but that just sounds ridiculous. Could have been so they wouldn't be doing it during class and not paying attention though...........I guess?
I'll start a sex-talk dialogue right now.
Oh. Not that kind of sex-talk. Sorry.
Dane Cook is god and I have the pictures to prove it.
Surely after watching every season of Friends "the talk" is completely unnecessary?
For Mac, yes. The Standard Talk is completely uncessary. This is a child who knows every word on the Rent soundtrack, including La Vie Boheme. That being said, The Alternative Parenting Talk is still to be had.
Bridge? Pictures?
Oh, man. MAK!!! Quit reading my great suggestions then telling Mom not to take them. Darnit. I so wanted to hear what that teacher had to say.
Maybe next time.
For now, email her once a week, telling her you are brushing up on your research skills, starting with the state standards.
hahahaahah
I'm evil!!!!!
Thankyou for the 'u'. I must admit I didn't see it until you pointed it out....prob coz it looks 'normal' to me, lol!
V
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