Thursday, March 02, 2006
This Is Hannah
Hannah is my niece. My sister Alison's 6-year-old girl-baby (Though how she ended up in her uterus and not mine, I'll never know. She is more me than she is either one of her parents.). And she just called me. But I was on the phone with my mom so I had to call her back. But by the time I did so, about 10 minutes later, all Hell was on the verge of breaking loose...
When I called her back, she said she wanted to know when was I going to send her a package for her birthday. I could hear Alison in the background telling her, "No, that's not why you called. Remember? It's right here. Tell Auntie about this."
"BUT I DON'T KNOW HOWWWWWWWWW! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!", she wailed, despite the fact that she had apparently just left a fairly coherent message on my cell phone. And while my sister was gently trying to remind her why she had called me in the first place, a meltdown of nuclear proportions was brewing. Alison was showing her the "thing", Hannah's crying was getting louder, and about the time I heard Ali say, "OK then, just go to your room.", I hollered (so hopefully they could hear me over the ruckus), "Let me talk to her!"
I had gathered by now that it was some homework thing she had called to ask me for help. So I got her on the phone and asked, "Hannah, is it some homework?"
Anguished. "YEEEEEEESSSSS!"
(Now, if you've never seen Hannah cry, then you must know that is is Very Dramatic indeed. Her face gets red, and her beautiful blue eyes fill with tears, her blonde hair sticks to her wet cheeks, and her bawling mixes with her talking so that anything she tries to say comes out wet and gooey and impossible to understand. Especially from 600 miles away.)
"Is it Math homework?"
Distressed. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Is it Reading homework?
Tortured. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO... IT'S A GAWBAREAADAH HABBBAEDAAGA POOOOEEEEEEMMMMMMMM!"
And, thankfully, I heard Ali in the background, "Hannah, do you want me to tell her what it is and then she can help you?"
(Yes! YES!! Please say YES, Hannah!)
Sniffly and snuffly, "Uh-huh."
"Ok. It's a name poem. She has to come up with a word for each of her letters that describes herself."
"Cool. Ok, Hannah? What's the first letter of your name?"
Weepy and defeated. "H."
"Ok. We need a word that describes you and starts with 'H'."
Gloomy. "I already have one."
"Great! What is it?"
"Happy."
Which made me laugh out loud. "Ok. (If you say so.)" And I could hear Ali cracking up in the background.
"What's next?"
"A. I have 'All-Star'."
"Good one! What's next?"
"N."
Silence.... I'm thinking. Mumbling, "something that describes Hannah that starts with 'N'....(thinking).........(thinking)....... Honey, all that comes to mind is 'Naughty'."
At which point, Ali, who can hear me, loses it, "That's the first thing I thought of too!" And even Hannah had to laugh at that. Because she is. No sense in anyone denying it.
"But we can't use that. (Thinking)..... (thinking)..... How about we come back to 'N'? What's next?"
Hannah laughs. "N."
"After that."
"A."
"How about 'Awesome'?"
"Yeah!" She likes that. I can hear her smile.
"I have an 'N'! 'Nice'!"
"Yeah!" she shouts.
"I have another one! 'Nature Girl'! You love nature!"
Gleeful. "Yeah!"
"What's next?"
Joyful. "H."
"Hows about 'Hilarious'?"
"I had 'Hippie-Girl." (THAT'S my girl!)
"Ooh! That's a really good one.
Now she's laughing. "Yeah, but how do you spell 'Hilarious'?"
And so ended a conversation that started with the saddest Kindergartener on the planet. She is:
Happy
All-Star
Nice
Nature-Girl
Awesome, and
Hilarious
And I love her.
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12 comments:
A name poem! What a great idea! I'm gonna start thinking of mine right now ;-D
And your niece is absolutely adorable! :-)
that is a great post. a great story. I felt like I was on the phone with you! She sounds like a doll. :)
What a cutie!!!
That was sooooooo funny...So when are you going to mail Miss Hannah Tate her birthday package :)...I think that a book case is out of the question. A birthday presant, from Auntie Paige, does not count unless it comes from the mail man!!!
Joyous
Obstinate
Hellacious
Nearly perfect
Mine's so much better than Hannah's. HA!
Pint-sized
Able
Impertinent
Genial
Exuberant
Exasperating
Miserly
Insensitive
Lesbian
(un)Yielding
Bright
Reliable
Energetic
Nice
Dependable
Available
I was going to say
Perfectly
Adorable
In
God's
Eyes
And mine as well. But I like yours.
Animated
Note-worthy
Nurturing
Insightful
Elegant (or elephants, hard to decide...)
Brandi
Bawdy
Risque
Alluring
Nubile
Daring
Influential
Emily. You're wearing black today, aren't you?
Brenda. "Available". That made me LOL.
Annie, I love your poems.
That Brandi girl sure sounds fun. Glad it's me. :)
I think your "E" should be "Eccentric". Not saying that you're not "Elegant", but you're more "Eccentric". The proof is in the pigtails. And boots. And weird trivia you know. Trust me on this.
Yet, your memory IS that of an "Elephant"...
No. "Eccentric".
Jovial
Epicure
Severe*
Steadfast
Immaterial
Concerted
Asinine
*Hey, I can be both jovial and severe, trust me.
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