The Day My Kid Broke Again

What is with these kids?

They keep breaking... and I don't think I'm doing anything wrong!

Well, only the big one seems to break so much. Since he's been born, he's broken his foot at 4, broken teeth TWICE at 11, hairline fractured his foot at 13, broke his arm at 14, and today I came home to the house stinking to high heaven. I followed my nose to the living room, where he was laid up on the couch, rubbing Icy-Hot on this ginormous bump on his foot...

"What'cha doin'?"

"I hurt my foot."

"How'd you do that?"

"I don't know. At least, it didn't hurt when I did it."

"Ok, let me look at it."

I touched the bump.

"OWWW!"

"Ok, let me see it." And I used his toes to turn his foot towards me.

"Arrrrgggghhhhh! God, Mom, that hurt!"

"Ok." Calling the doctor.

Which, by the way, closes at 1600. After that, you have to go to Urgent Care. The doc told me to come in, and when I got there, I was apparently interrupting some bitchy nurse who was busy leaning on the desk and gave me attitude along the lines of, "Well, it can't be hurt too badly because he's walking on it and why would you want to come here and make me work when I'm clearly on duty." Adding to my complaints about Government Employees. Anyway, before I could jump her, our flight surgeon came around the corner and told her he had already talked to me and told me to come in. (At which point I really wanted to stick my tongue at her, but then remembered I AM 36 years old...)

Turns out it's just sprained. They took x-rays and nothing seems to be broken. We'll keep an eye on it. Apparently, there may have been a questionable landing off a curb earlier today, but that's not very cool, so the cover story now is that he hurt it skateboarding.