Noodle took 4th in Dive Divisionals today!!!
Woo-hooo!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not bad for a girl that just started diving 8 weeks ago...
Now we're looking into the Winter Dive Program at George Mason University...
Sunday, July 31, 2005
Friday, July 29, 2005
Thursday, July 28, 2005
News to Make you Sick
So.
A woman got mad at her 4-year-old son yesterday and kicked him out of the car ON THE BELTWAY (!). As she was pulling away, he tried to get back in. She then hit him and drove off.
What the FUCK?!?!?!
What twisted part of her brain decided that dumping him on the freeway was the appropriate resopnse? WHAT could a 4-year-old (who was SURELY restrained in a carseat) have done that was so repugnant to warrant her behavior?
I sincerely believe that sterilization should be a part of her punishment. Unless we could go straight to firing squad and nip any further problems in the bud...
A woman got mad at her 4-year-old son yesterday and kicked him out of the car ON THE BELTWAY (!). As she was pulling away, he tried to get back in. She then hit him and drove off.
What the FUCK?!?!?!
What twisted part of her brain decided that dumping him on the freeway was the appropriate resopnse? WHAT could a 4-year-old (who was SURELY restrained in a carseat) have done that was so repugnant to warrant her behavior?
I sincerely believe that sterilization should be a part of her punishment. Unless we could go straight to firing squad and nip any further problems in the bud...
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
The Accidental Job
I think I accidentally got a job today.
Here's how it happened:
A few weeks ago, Tater heard that the Customer Service Rep. position for our neighborhood* was in need of a body. Naturally, he thought of me. (Insert scowling emoticon.) Even though I didn't want to start working until September. So he talked to the Girl In Charge and told her I would call her.
*We live in a hybrid condo-townhouse, which means that we own it, but they can boss us around about paint colors, plantings, outside decoration (Allowed: NONE), but it also means that if my bricks start falling off my house or the roof caves in, they are responsible.
So call her I did (two days later).
She asked me what my Skills were.
A vacant expression came over me... I make a great Lasagna. I can dance and make a fruity Margarita. I crack my friends up and make decent jewelry. I write a marginally interesting journal, and I'm a damn good Mom (if I do say so myself). I have a degree in Psychology and one in Criminology, I can decorate a house and plant a beautiful garden...
But NONE of this does me any good in an Office. With a Computer and a Fax Machine, a Copier and a telephone with all the fancy buttons.
Before I could formulate an acceptable answer, she asked me if I could use Excel and Word ("sure! what the hell!") and asked me to meet her this morning. I talked to her for about 15 minutes before she asked me if I could start on Monday. ("sure! what the hell!")
Office Work was never on my radar of job possibilities. It sounds boring. And tedious. And Not Fun. And I have strict guidelines about only doing things that are Fun. Life Is Too Short.
But the logistics of this job are perfect. It's Monday - Friday, 9-1 or 2, it's only about 3 blocks from home and 1 block from the Noodle's school. It's a one person office, basically an assistant for the Girl In Charge I talked to today. It pays $12/hour, they are flexible concerning snow days and doctor appointments, school functions and short vacations. And I can wear jeans.
So I have to meet the President of Board on Friday so he can give me the once-over and we'll see what happens.
(But seeing as how I'm their only applicant and even using half my brain power I could handle the responsibilities, I'm not too worried.)
Here's how it happened:
A few weeks ago, Tater heard that the Customer Service Rep. position for our neighborhood* was in need of a body. Naturally, he thought of me. (Insert scowling emoticon.) Even though I didn't want to start working until September. So he talked to the Girl In Charge and told her I would call her.
*We live in a hybrid condo-townhouse, which means that we own it, but they can boss us around about paint colors, plantings, outside decoration (Allowed: NONE), but it also means that if my bricks start falling off my house or the roof caves in, they are responsible.
So call her I did (two days later).
She asked me what my Skills were.
A vacant expression came over me... I make a great Lasagna. I can dance and make a fruity Margarita. I crack my friends up and make decent jewelry. I write a marginally interesting journal, and I'm a damn good Mom (if I do say so myself). I have a degree in Psychology and one in Criminology, I can decorate a house and plant a beautiful garden...
But NONE of this does me any good in an Office. With a Computer and a Fax Machine, a Copier and a telephone with all the fancy buttons.
Before I could formulate an acceptable answer, she asked me if I could use Excel and Word ("sure! what the hell!") and asked me to meet her this morning. I talked to her for about 15 minutes before she asked me if I could start on Monday. ("sure! what the hell!")
Office Work was never on my radar of job possibilities. It sounds boring. And tedious. And Not Fun. And I have strict guidelines about only doing things that are Fun. Life Is Too Short.
But the logistics of this job are perfect. It's Monday - Friday, 9-1 or 2, it's only about 3 blocks from home and 1 block from the Noodle's school. It's a one person office, basically an assistant for the Girl In Charge I talked to today. It pays $12/hour, they are flexible concerning snow days and doctor appointments, school functions and short vacations. And I can wear jeans.
So I have to meet the President of Board on Friday so he can give me the once-over and we'll see what happens.
(But seeing as how I'm their only applicant and even using half my brain power I could handle the responsibilities, I'm not too worried.)
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Blue Ribbons and Guitars
Just home from the Dive meet.
Mac got First Place!!
She rocked the house and now has a very beautiful perma-smile on her face.
AND, FYI, she got first place in freestyle last night and almost-first place (otherwise known as second) in breast last night. She missed it by 22 hundreths of a second....
And Mom just told me Dillon had his first guitar lesson today and enjoyed it very much. THAT'S my little Hippie. :)
Mac got First Place!!
She rocked the house and now has a very beautiful perma-smile on her face.
AND, FYI, she got first place in freestyle last night and almost-first place (otherwise known as second) in breast last night. She missed it by 22 hundreths of a second....
And Mom just told me Dillon had his first guitar lesson today and enjoyed it very much. THAT'S my little Hippie. :)
Monday, July 25, 2005
Hoo-Ha Talk
Feeling better, though I think I overdid it yesterday. I spent all day puttering around the house - I just couldn't sit around for another day. I vacuumed, cleaned the kitchen, rearranged the pantry (hello, OCD!), did some laundry, made pancakes for breakfast (and cookies for lunch!), worked in the yard a bit, then took Noodle to Blockbuster. Princess Diaries 2. Cute. (If you're a girl.)
And now I'm bleeding like a stuck pig.
Though anyone who would stick a pig in her hoo-ha is a sick, sick puppy.
Enough hoo-ha-talk. Noodle only has one more week of swim and dive team. She has mixed feelings about that. She's had enough of getting up every morning to swim at 7:30, but truly loves to go to dive practice every afternoon. Key word: AFTERNOON. I think she would be enjoying swimming more if it weren't so early. I'll be interested to see what she does next summer.
And now I'm bleeding like a stuck pig.
Though anyone who would stick a pig in her hoo-ha is a sick, sick puppy.
Enough hoo-ha-talk. Noodle only has one more week of swim and dive team. She has mixed feelings about that. She's had enough of getting up every morning to swim at 7:30, but truly loves to go to dive practice every afternoon. Key word: AFTERNOON. I think she would be enjoying swimming more if it weren't so early. I'll be interested to see what she does next summer.
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Reese's Penis
So.
Noodle and I were standing in the checkout line of Target the other day. I'm checking out the candy selection to see if there's anything interesting to rot the teeth out of our heads and make us fat, when I spot something. "Hey, Noodle. Look! Reese's Penis!"
Really Loud.
Then we started laughing Really Loud. The lady in front of us, and the lady behind us, and the checkout lady - none were laughing. But we were DYING! We couldn't catch our breath. We had tears squirting out our eyes. And the more they DIDN'T laugh, the more we did.
We made it though the checkout lane, all the way to the car I kept an eye on my back for Child Protective Services, and when we got to the car, Noodle looks at me and says, "Reese's Penis?"
(Hysterical laughter again......) (And again and again, periodically through the night.)
What I had actually meant to say was, "Look Noodle, REESE'S PIECES WITH PEANUTS."
Be warned.
Noodle and I were standing in the checkout line of Target the other day. I'm checking out the candy selection to see if there's anything interesting to rot the teeth out of our heads and make us fat, when I spot something. "Hey, Noodle. Look! Reese's Penis!"
Really Loud.
Then we started laughing Really Loud. The lady in front of us, and the lady behind us, and the checkout lady - none were laughing. But we were DYING! We couldn't catch our breath. We had tears squirting out our eyes. And the more they DIDN'T laugh, the more we did.
We made it though the checkout lane, all the way to the car I kept an eye on my back for Child Protective Services, and when we got to the car, Noodle looks at me and says, "Reese's Penis?"
(Hysterical laughter again......) (And again and again, periodically through the night.)
What I had actually meant to say was, "Look Noodle, REESE'S PIECES WITH PEANUTS."
Be warned.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Hating the Updates
I always hate it when I let so many days go by without updating. Then the prospect of picking things up from here seems overwhelming. Where do I start? Do I recap? (I hate recaps.) Do I just start from today? (Today was boring.) How 'bout a compromise: I'll hit the highlights. I can think of a couple people who are wondering if I fell off the face of the earth again...
First of all, D made it home from Florida ok. It took him forever to get off the plane and I was having a panic attack that he had gotten on the wrong plane again and was waiting for me in Albuquerque.
Then the next day my parents arrived for a visit. We saw Arlington, Mt Vernon, Lincoln, FDR, Jefferson, WWII, Navy, Women in Service Memorials...We went to the Museum of Natural History, the Air & Space Museum and tried to see the Declaration of Independence (line too long)... went to 3 swim & dive meets, the Nursery to buy plants for my birthday, and ordered out Chinese. After the week we were all exhausted and lost about 5 lbs each in water-weight from our reinactment of the Bataan Death March the day we saw all the memorials.
Our G5 tanked and it took a week, my laptop, several phone calls to Apple, and a trip to the Apple Store to fix it.
D went back to Indiana with my parents for a month to work. Doing hard labor, hopefully.
(Boys, TMI just around the bend...)
I had my D&C, Hysteroscopy, Polypectomy, and Biopsy (check me out, I'm like WebMD) done on Monday. Today is Wednesday, and I surprisingly still feel like crap. I have to pee constantly, until this morning I was constipated (making me think of Dooce at the most inappropriate times), immediately after which solving THAT problem I started bleeding again, I'm still cramping, laughing hurts and I feel like someone inflated a balloon in my belly, and on top of it all, I have a clearish-yellowish discharge. I am, in a word, Gross.
First of all, D made it home from Florida ok. It took him forever to get off the plane and I was having a panic attack that he had gotten on the wrong plane again and was waiting for me in Albuquerque.
Then the next day my parents arrived for a visit. We saw Arlington, Mt Vernon, Lincoln, FDR, Jefferson, WWII, Navy, Women in Service Memorials...We went to the Museum of Natural History, the Air & Space Museum and tried to see the Declaration of Independence (line too long)... went to 3 swim & dive meets, the Nursery to buy plants for my birthday, and ordered out Chinese. After the week we were all exhausted and lost about 5 lbs each in water-weight from our reinactment of the Bataan Death March the day we saw all the memorials.
Our G5 tanked and it took a week, my laptop, several phone calls to Apple, and a trip to the Apple Store to fix it.
D went back to Indiana with my parents for a month to work. Doing hard labor, hopefully.
(Boys, TMI just around the bend...)
I had my D&C, Hysteroscopy, Polypectomy, and Biopsy (check me out, I'm like WebMD) done on Monday. Today is Wednesday, and I surprisingly still feel like crap. I have to pee constantly, until this morning I was constipated (making me think of Dooce at the most inappropriate times), immediately after which solving THAT problem I started bleeding again, I'm still cramping, laughing hurts and I feel like someone inflated a balloon in my belly, and on top of it all, I have a clearish-yellowish discharge. I am, in a word, Gross.
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